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Welcome to NerdWallet’s Smart Money podcast, where we answer your real-world money questions. In this episode:

Learn how you could save money by caring less about what other people think and how to weigh the pros and cons of a job offer.

How can you save money by not caring about others’ opinions? How does commute time factor into whether you should take an in-person job? Hosts Sean Pyles and Sara Rathner discuss freeing yourself from the pressures of social validation and adopting smart spending habits to help you understand how these approaches can boost your financial well-being. They begin with a discussion of saving money by “not caring,” with tips and tricks on avoiding unnecessary spending influenced by social media influencers, focusing on purchases that genuinely make you happy, and recognizing the fleeting dopamine rush from new buys. They also delve into strategies such as choosing unique vintage clothing, the benefits of a capsule wardrobe, and making thoughtful car-buying decisions.

Then, hosts Elizabeth Ayoola and Sara Rathner talk to Andrew, a listener in Miami, about his decision to start a new job that would increase both his salary and his commute time. They discuss the trade-offs of job changes, the impact on work-life balance, and questions you can ask yourself to help align your career progression with core values.

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This transcript was generated from podcast audio by an AI tool.

Sean Pyles:

Teddy Roosevelt once said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” But if you’re not careful, it can also be the thief of your hard-earned money.

Sara Rathner:

In this episode, we’ll help you find ways to save money by simply not giving a hoot about what people think.

Sean Pyles:

Welcome to NerdWallet’s Smart Money Podcast. I’m Sean Pyles.

Sara Rathner:

And I’m Sara Rathner. Later in this episode, I am joined by our co-host, Elizabeth Ayoola, to talk with a listener about how they should weigh the pros and cons of accepting a job offer that requires a big lifestyle change. Is a bump in salary necessarily worth it?

Sean Pyles:

But first, we’re going to talk about how you can save money and probably your self-esteem by not caring what people think or comparing yourself to others. If you are a millennial who was bullied into purchasing crew socks because the TikTok youths made you feel bad about your ankle socks, this segment is for you.

So, Sara, I know this idea of not caring what other people think, not basing your self-worth on how you stack up to others, and using it as a way to save money is something that’s been top of mind for you lately, right?

Sara Rathner:

It actually came up in a Slack conversation with a coworker where we joked about having to Google certain Gen Z phrases to find out what they mean. And I remember being 22 in my first full-time job, and coworkers at the time would ask me to define millennial slang, and now I’m the old. It’s kind of freeing not understanding what people are talking about sometimes.

Sean Pyles:

That’s true.

Sara Rathner:

I mean, part of it is the lived experience. You just let time pass, and you become more comfortable just being you. You’ve just been you for a longer period of time, and you accept your flaws. Also, part of it is just buying stuff over the years and then coming to an understanding as to what purchases will bring me greater happiness long-term, and then which won’t. So if something doesn’t matter to me, I don’t follow the trend. A friend of mine who’s a couple of years older than me once told me that the decade of life I’ve just entered is the FU 40s, where you reach this level of peace. You focus on what’s important to you, and the rest just kind of fades away. And you know what? She was right. The second I turned 40, my ability to care just really went down. It might be because I have a toddler and my ability to care is just pretty low.

Sean Pyles:

Yeah. Your priorities have shifted.

Sara Rathner:

Yeah, mostly it’s just about preventing him from falling off of stuff at this point.

Sean Pyles:

That’s a good thing to focus on.

Sara Rathner:

I don’t have time to care about anything else.

Sean Pyles:

Sara Rathner:

So anyway, my point is this: I am going to continue to use the ankle socks I already own and love. Thank you.

Sean Pyles:

And that is your right. Okay. Let’s talk about how people can vanquish the allure of comparison or caring what people think about you and using consumer purchases to prop up the image that you project to the world. I have a few quick tips here.

First, please remember this simple humbling fact: No one thinks about you as much as you think about you. People are not thinking days later about the new outfit that you wore into the office or the vacation pics that you posted on Instagram because they are too busy thinking about their outfits and their photos that they posted on Instagram.

Next, realize that the dopamine bump that you get from a purchase just doesn’t last. It won’t be long before you are hunting for something else to spend money on that makes you feel good. And put those two facts together, and you can begin to see why spending money on something with the hopes of impressing people just isn’t the best investment.

Sara Rathner:

And again, if something you love is, say, fashion, you’re spending money on something that brings you a lot of joy, you enjoy the creativity of putting outfits together, you enjoy hunting for something that you love in stores, then do it. Just put more of your budget into that and maybe avoid purchases that don’t matter as much so you have more money to fund the things that you love and then also fund your savings because that’s important, but you’re not really spending money to impress people in other areas. I’m not knocking people who like buying clothes. I like it too. Just understand that if there’s one thing you love, you can’t have everything.

Sean Pyles:

Yeah, you’re doing it because you want to do it to make yourself happy, not because you’re trying to impress this vague idea of someone else who might think that you look cool.

Sara Rathner:

Right. And if you’re spending a lot of time scrolling on your phone, you kind of develop these parasocial relationships with social media influencers. They’re not your friends. They’re trying to sell you stuff. They get paid when they sell you stuff. This is a very one-sided relationship, and they’re the only ones that benefit.

Let’s talk about a few specific areas where you can easily cut back on just spending money to look cool. And we’ve talked about fashion and your wardrobe. And the thing is, compared to years ago, clothing quality is total crap even for more expensive items. But on the lower-cost side, you buy a T-shirt or a sweater, wear it once, wash it once, and then it becomes a tissue. Chasing trends, you know, this shape of clothing is in style this season, and this detail is in style that season, and then this color, and constantly buying new and going on these clothing hauls, you are going to have a closet full of garbage after a while.

Sean Pyles:

One of my personal and financial goals for this year was to rethink the way that I consume clothes because I am one of those people that likes to have clothes that make me feel good and that are kind of unique and different. So I set out to not buy any new articles of clothing, as in brand new pieces of clothing from a store. Since I do like getting unique vintage pieces, I allowed myself to shop on eBay where I find a lot of cool stuff or at local thrift stores, and I did let myself purchase things from there. So far this year, I found that I’m spending less on clothing, my environmental impact is lower, and I’m also just much less likely to buy something for the sake of updating my wardrobe to get the latest style or cut of jeans or whatever.

Sara Rathner:

And one thing, if you’re trying to minimize how much clothing you buy as some sort of personal challenge, you could try the capsule wardrobe thing, wear the same 20 pieces of clothing in different ways for a month, and force yourself to be creative, and in a way, that can make you fall in love with some of your old clothing again.

Sean Pyles:

Yeah, God, I have so many pieces of clothing that I’ve not worn in over a year, but I will not get rid of them because maybe one day I will wear them again.

All right, well, let’s talk about another area where you can stop trying to impress people — your car. A lot of people buy or lease a flashy car as a status symbol, but that can be one of the riskiest financial decisions that you can make, especially since the average price of a new car was north of $48,000 in July of 2024 according to Cox Automotive. And new vehicles, which often come with loads of computers and sensors, are also more expensive to repair. So you have an expensive car payment, insurance is not going to be cheap, and repairs will also be pricey. There’s nothing wrong with getting an affordable, reliable used car and just driving it until the wheels fall off. So, Sara, I know that your household recently bought a car, right? So how did you approach that?

Sara Rathner:

Yeah, we bought a used 2022 Honda CR-V hybrid a year ago when prices on used cars finally started to come down somewhat. We traded in a 14-year-old compact car that was worth maybe $1,200 at that point because we needed a car that fit the car seat and the stroller and all that stuff, and the compact car didn’t. We had to push the front passenger seat up all the way to fit the car seat. So, not ideal. It wasn’t great for longer-term family use, and we share one car, my husband and I. So we needed something that worked for all of us—both adults, the baby, and the giant dog.

So I have to say, honestly, this is one of the nicest cars I’ve ever driven. It has all of those fancy safety sensors that are standard now. I have a backup camera for the first time in my life. The thing is, this is not a sexy car; it’s a mom-mobile. The trunk always has reusable grocery bags in it. I’m just in that phase of life, and I hope that we drive this thing long enough that the backseat is eventually filled with my future preteen son and his sweaty friends after soccer practice.

Sean Pyles:

Well, that sounds really well thought out. It’s like the kind of car that fits your needs for where you are in life right now.

Sara Rathner:

Yeah, I was saying maybe one day we’ll hand it to him, and it’ll be his car, and it’ll be like, “This car is older than you.” And it’ll still drive well. That would be ideal.

All right, so Sean, you bought a car a couple of years ago. How did you think about that purchase?

Sean Pyles:

Well, here’s the part where I say that buying a car for the right reasons doesn’t mean that you have to buy a total clunker or something that’s completely utilitarian. I drive a lovely 2016 BMW X1, which I named Bette Midnight after the character Bette Porter from the show The L Word. Maybe TMI, but I do really love my car, and having a BMW might sound fancy and obnoxious, but I got an amazing deal on my car back in May 2020, and my payment is a little under $350 monthly. I justify it however I want to, basically, but here’s why I bought this car.

In high school and in college, I drove a severely busted Honda Civic where the muffler was rusted out and literally dragged on the road behind me. When it came time to get my first big-boy car, I wanted something just a little nicer than that. I will admit that as much as I love my car, I do live with a certain amount of cognitive dissonance where whenever I see a BMW driver on the road, I think, “Wow, that guy’s such a jerk.” And then I realize that that’s me, that I’m the jerk now.

Sara Rathner:

Yeah, I think if every one of us took a moment to really think about it, we’re all the jerk sometimes.

Sean Pyles:

Sara Rathner:

Yeah. So when you see your own face reflected in the window of a BMW that you don’t actually drive, you can just live with that emotion.

Sean Pyles:

Yeah. Give yourself some grace for being a jerk every so often, but within reason.

Sara Rathner:

Yeah, and then just try to be better.

Sean Pyles:

Sara Rathner:

Sean Pyles:

Well, I would say go back to what we talked about in the beginning. Get the car that you want for the right reasons because it’ll make you happy and not because you’re trying to look cool. Also, do a lot of research on the kind of car that you want. When I bought my car back in 2020, I had a spreadsheet, of course, and I listed the models that I was considering, their average annual repair cost, their miles per gallon, among other factors. And then also know your personal numbers, as in how much car you can afford. NerdWallet recommends spending no more than 10% of your monthly take-home pay on your auto payment alone. That’s not including insurance, gas, etc. And if you want to see how much car you can really afford, check out NerdWallet’s Auto Loan Calculator. You can find a link in this episode’s show notes post or by just searching “NerdWallet Auto Loan Calculator.”

Sara Rathner:

Yeah. And once you figure out what you could comfortably afford, then you can just stroll into a car dealership with a bit more confidence. And you should do that because car salespeople can smell uncertainty from several miles away, and they will pounce on you, and then you’ll end up buying the car that is not right for you because of pressure. So you don’t want to deal with that situation. So switching gears…

Sean Pyles:

Pun intended.

Sara Rathner:

Hard joke, right? Pun intended. Let’s talk about one more area where you could save money by not trying to impress people. And that is when you go out of your way to do really expensive stuff just for the goal of bragging about it online. I’m talking meals out where you photograph every dish or taking vacations just so you can post photos of the Eiffel Tower or whatever on social media. And the thing is, if expensive vacations or nice dinners bring you joy, that’s great. I love vacations. I take them as often as I can. That can be a priority in your budget, but just doing it to show off and then going into debt to do those sorts of things isn’t a great idea.

Sean Pyles:

Yeah. I was recently having dinner with a group of people, and one of the folks at the table was talking about their recent travels and how they went to X, Y, Z locale just to check the box and say they’ve been there, not because they particularly cared about the place’s historical or cultural significance. And that struck me as a little bit odd. When you’re traveling, you want to see the important destinations, of course, but that should be because you want to do it for yourself, not because you are impressing people in your social media feed who, again, don’t really care that much about whatever you’ve seen.

Sara Rathner:

Yeah. If you want to go to Venice, Venice is beautiful. You should see it. It’s a lovely city, and I recommend it, but not just for the ‘gram.

Sean Pyles:

Sara Rathner:

It should be because you actually want to go and immerse yourself and get to know people there and just really have a wonderful time and not just hop in for a day, check the box, and run out. Cities deserve our attention. They always do. So this gets to a good question that people should ask themselves whenever they’re making any sort of discretionary purchase, which is simply, why? Why are you spending money on this thing or this experience, and what do you expect it to do for you?

Sean Pyles:

Sometimes the answer is just, “It’ll make me happy.” And that’s actually one of the best answers that you can give. And so far as saving money, there are some really easy ways to have great experiences and not break the bank. Travel-wise, we Nerds often recommend traveling in the off-season if your schedule is flexible. You’re likely to find cheaper airfare, plus you won’t have to elbow your way through hordes of strangers to see the sites.

Sara Rathner:

I think that’s enough on how to save money by not giving a… You could fill in that throat-clearing section with any word you’d like. Before we move on to this episode’s money question segment, a reminder, listener, that we are running another book giveaway sweepstakes ahead of our next Nerdy Book Club episode. Our next guest is Jannese Torres, author of Financially Lit!: The Modern Latina’s Guide to Level Up Your Dinero & Become Financially Poderosa. That means powerful, by the way, which offers tips to young people on how to get started with managing their money.

Sean Pyles:

To enter for a chance to win our book giveaway, send an email to [email protected] with the subject “Book Sweepstakes” during the sweepstakes period. Entries must be received by 11:59 PM Pacific Time on August 22nd. Include the following information: your first and last name, email address, zip code, and phone number. For more information, please visit our official sweepstakes rules page.

Sara Rathner:

All right. Now, let’s get into my conversation with our co-host, Elizabeth Ayoola, and a listener about a big job change that listener is considering.

Welcome to NerdWallet’s Smart Money Podcast, where you send us your money questions, and we answer them with the help of our genius Nerds. I’m Sara Rathner.

Elizabeth Ayoola:

And I’m Elizabeth Ayoola. Now, if you have a money question for the Nerds, call or text us on the Nerd hotline at 901-730-6373. Again, that’s 901-730-NERD. You can also email us at [email protected].

Sara Rathner:

Follow us wherever you get your podcasts. And if you like what you hear, leave us a review and tell a friend. We are back, and we’re joined by a listener, Andrew, who has some questions about the trade-offs of leaving a work-from-home job for one that might pay more. Andrew is 37 years old and lives in South Florida. Welcome to Smart Money, Andrew.

Thanks. Thanks for having me. Big fan.

Sara Rathner:

So before we get into the conversation, a quick reminder that we’re not here to give you individualized financial advice. Our goal is to provide the information you need to make the most informed financial decision for your situation. Does that make sense?

Yes, ma’am.

Elizabeth Ayoola:

All right, awesome. So let’s get into it, Andrew. Now, I know you have some really good questions for us about the trade-offs of leaving your work-from-home gig for one that is in the office but pays more. However, before we get into that, can you talk to us about your financial situation generally right now? Tell us, what are your financial goals, and what are some of your pain points?

Currently, I am building up my emergency fund, which I know you guys are well-versed with that. Three to six months of expenses, erring more towards the six. After that, just looking to automate everything—529, Roth contributions, saving for vacations, saving for a new car. Real estate-wise, we’re all set. We own one, are landlords on two others. Not looking to rent, not looking to move anytime soon. So I’d say we’re stable. We only have the mortgages, no other debt.

Sara Rathner:

And tell us a little bit about your home and family situation. Who else lives with you? Who are you supporting? What are you working for basically?

I got the missus and two little ones. One is in grade school now, so that daycare payment stopped, thankfully, but the other one is still in it for another two years. That’s a pain point just because there’s not going to be any tuition or scholarship until she’s four. So we have at least a year or two of these monthly payments. That’d be the biggest pain point right now.

Sara Rathner:

And you mentioned having a spouse. Are they also working?

She’s a props master, which is a super cool job—gets to make things and see them on stage in theater productions—but that doesn’t pay what I would call a living wage, and that’s also part-time. She’s the primary transporter of the children and making sure they’re clothed and shuttled around to all their activities.

Sara Rathner:

So you got a call from a recruiter about a new job that might pay a decent amount more, might be enough of an incentive to leave the job that you have now, but it’s in an office and you live in a really high-traffic city. So you want to tell us a little bit about that and what questions that potential opportunity has brought up for you?

Definitely. As we know, a couple of years ago, we experienced quite the phenomenon worldwide, which shifted everyone to working from home. Honestly, it was kind of a dream for me, even pre-pandemic. 2016, 2017, I thought to myself, “All I need is a laptop, and I can do almost everything from home” at the job that I was at. And I did do that sometimes, even back then. I’d come home and work more; I’d still have to go to work in the morning.

So post-pandemic, it’s been a blessing for a lot of people. I feel, at least me personally, I’ve gotten to get in shape and hang out in a very pivotal time in the kids’ lives, from zero to six. But Miami, in particular, poses its challenges. One, it’s a high-cost-of-living city. The switching costs of moving closer to our central business districts is not easy. The traffic is pretty bad, but what’s worse is likely the road rage, as Miami is the first and third place road rage capital of the country. So that’s where the stress versus money payoff comes into play.

Sara Rathner:

And I will say this, that I loved your question because Elizabeth and I are both intimately acquainted with South Florida traffic. I’m from Miami originally, Elizabeth is living in South Florida. I learned to drive in Miami, so I know that road rage too well. How long would your commute be, and how much more money are we talking?

So commute minimum would be an hour, and this is 20 miles, maybe less.

Sara Rathner:

And this is each way?

Each way. It’s likely closer to 80 minutes, 90 minutes. And if there’s an accident or something, it might even be two hours each way. And I believe the position when I first emailed you guys was four days a week in the office, maybe five days a week in the office. For where that one was located geographically, it just didn’t make sense to basically give up 10, 12, 14 hours a week just in the car. I’d get to listen to a lot of your guys’ podcast for sure, but I’d run out of that pretty quick. The money, anywhere from $60,000 to $70,000 increase. I tried running an analysis—extra gas, extra wear and tear, oil, increased tax. Given where that one was, I think the resounding response and what all the Redditors told me was absolutely not.

Elizabeth Ayoola:

What comes to mind for me, I always find these scenarios a great way to revisit your core values. I think a good way, especially for listeners who may be in this kind of dilemma, to weigh it out is to think about what your values are and think about what your ideal life looks like. I know for me personally in my career, that has been a guiding light for me. I know before this job, I was working at a job that was pretty comfortable, but I had to go to the office every day, and one of my highest values is flexibility and freedom. So being able to have the freedom to work from home and choose my lunchtime or maybe do a quick workout in between meetings is really important to me. So did you find that you weighed your values when you were kind of making this decision as well? I know you just mentioned things like taxes and other kind of quantifiable things, but did you think about your values as well?

I did. And I don’t know if it’s a faux pas to mention another money expert on this show, but I listened to and read Ramit Sethi, which I’m sure you guys are familiar with him, and he talks about the concept of your rich life. And for the majority of the people he talked to, fixed income is way too high. Their income-to-housing cost is way too high. We’re in an okay position there to where I don’t need necessarily to earn $50,000 more, but part of my rich life, as silly as it may sound, is now Brazilian jiu-jitsu, and the gym is 12 minutes away, and I can go every night or as much as my wife would allow.

If I’m working a downtown job, getting home at 6:45, hungry, have to go to the bathroom, then I don’t know that I’m going to have the energy to then go out and fight. And that’s my primary way of keeping in shape. So I just know that if I take a downtown job where I’m there every day, getting my Chipotle every day for lunch, it’s likely going to cause some health implications.

Sara Rathner:

It’s funny because when you sent us this question, it seemed like you hadn’t yet made the decision, and in that time you have, and in this case, you decided not to pursue this opportunity. But in the future, if you were faced with a similar potential opportunity, a similar decision, is there a number or a type of role that would make you say yes? What in your value system might make you make a different decision in the future?

Interesting you should mention that because a mere 90 minutes ago, I was talking to a recruiter who messaged me on LinkedIn, but she presented a pretty interesting opportunity. The increase in base pay would be about $42,000, which is less than the other job, but it’s also closer. And this one’s hybrid—three in, two home. So despite less money, I do get two days back, and it’s about an hour total, less commuting per day. The role itself is non-managerial, which at this stage, that interests me a little more just with the little ones that I’m already managing at home. I don’t necessarily want a team of five or six analysts under me that I need to manage as well. The talk went fine with the recruiter, and she’s going to pass along my info to the in-house recruiter. So that one’s a little bit more compelling, even though it’s less money, which I guess reveals to me that I really do value the time and the travel more than the dollars.

Sara Rathner:

And I asked some questions about your family life because I think when you have a two-partner household and maybe one person brings in more money, it’s very easy to continue chasing even more money because that’s your role. You’re the one that is largely the financial breadwinner. And I like to hear that you’re also thinking about the effect it might have on everybody that’s at home, not just your children but also your wife, because your greater absence would put more on her plate with no additional income on her part, and it might even interrupt her ability to continue earning an income because there’s just more at home to do while you are not physically there. It’s not just about the money; it’s also about the time, and getting to use your own bathroom is the best.

Yeah, that’s true.

Elizabeth Ayoola:

It is. And I will just add, I personally think there are some scenarios where you may sacrifice convenience a little bit if you have a financial goal. I definitely know last year that was the situation for me. I was behind on my retirement savings, and I basically picked up a whole bunch of freelance work to try to boost my retirement savings. So it did mean that I had less free time. But it’s nice to have a timeframe. If someone else, again, another listener, is in this scenario and decides, “Hey, I really need that extra $60,000 or $70,000,” to maybe have a timeframe to it and say, “Maybe I can do this for two or three years just so I can accomplish my goal.” And then I can circle back to whatever lifestyle I was living before, if that is a possibility.

Yeah. And I think from a long-term goal, my experience has been that whenever I’ve switched jobs, I’ve gotten more, and that more has now become my new floor. I’ve never taken a pay decrease, fortunately. That might not be the experience for everyone, but that’s been my experience. It’d be almost preposterous for me to two or three years from now request $175,000 as a base, getting paid what I’m getting paid now. Whereas this most recent opportunity would put me in striking distance, base and bonus, of the 200s. So there’s also the long-term 5-10 year consideration. But what if we have more children? What if we want private school? What if we want to buy a single-family in the city? That’s at least a million dollars to buy a single-family in the city. Those are some other considerations I’m going through.

Sara Rathner:

Yeah, braces and summer camp don’t pay for themselves, unfortunately.

Elizabeth Ayoola:

Sara Rathner:

As your kids get older, your family’s needs get more complicated. Just when you think daycare tuition is off your plate…

Sara Rathner:

…in come the travel sports.

Sara Rathner:

So Andrew, you mentioned that obviously a really great way to boost your salary over time is to switch jobs. You typically get bigger salary bumps when you switch companies than you would if you were to stay put and just accept periodic raises. But in your current job, in your current industry, your current employer, do you see opportunities to bloom where you’re currently planted and perhaps pursue higher salary positions, promotions, or even just make the case for a major salary bump and not have to switch jobs and start going into an office?

I would say yes. I work for a very, very large bank, which means we have a lot of departments. Fortunately, the powers that be are very pro-horizontal mobility, get experience in this department, this specialty area, and then not necessarily, you could always come back, every department has their staffing need, but you still have those relationships, which is a very cool culture and one of the reasons I like where I’m at. I’ve also been promoted once, asked for a decent raise—nothing out of this world, a couple percentage points—but they’ve been granted.

There is some wiggle room within my position, and then if I’m willing to make sort of a not horizontal, not vertical move, sort of a lateral move, diagonal, that could be $10,000 to $15,000. And lastly, my boss has expressed interest in me taking their job and then them getting promoted. Honestly, that’s not something I’m looking to do right now. Again, don’t want to add stress, but again, I might hit a ceiling in my rank, and that’s the next logical step. So I’ve been thinking about that, but not something I’m really wanting to do within the next six months, I would say. So there is some opportunity where I’m at, but I can’t just come out and say, “Hey, I want a 40% raise. Look what they’re trying to pay me.”

Sara Rathner:

Another thing to think about too is as you move up the ranks in your career and you’re approaching your 40s, for a lot of people, it means management or at least a senior-level position that’s not management, but also recognizing what extra hours are you potentially going to have to work in this new role? Are you still going to be able to cut it at a 40, maybe 50 hours a week position, or suddenly there are going to be increased demands on your time?

Yeah, I think company culture is huge. At my former employer a couple of employers ago, they had what I would call a Wall Street culture, which personally, it just wasn’t for me—the 7:00 to 7:00 minimum and then the ambitious people working Saturday and Sunday. Kudos, I hope you have a yacht by now, but that just wasn’t for me. Fortunately, where I’m at has more of a Main Street culture. Obviously, as a manager, I would be subject to more deadlines and responsibilities to those above me and managing the people below me to make sure that we can fulfill all our deadlines. But I wouldn’t see myself working till 6:30 or 7:00. They’re very big on PTO, and when you’re on PTO, they’re very good on work-life balance, which is another reason I like where I’m at.

Sara Rathner:

So one more thing to think about, if you were to take an opportunity in the future that even is a hybrid role, and this is something that people might realize if they transition from work-from-home to hybrid or a fully in-person position: are there any home tasks that you will need to pay to outsource to make up for the fact that you’re not physically present to help with those tasks? And is that something that you would need to work into your budget to make working away from home possible for you?

For the first one, even though it was even more money than the second one, I thought, “Well, I’m just going to have to hire a maid and a chauffeur.” So what’s even the point when I could do those things and it’d be a wash? I’d be working more, and then I guess I’d stimulate the economy by hiring two people. But I’m not really looking to be an economic stimulant other than through spending. As we free up cash flow from what were former debt payments, we could bring someone in to tidy the home. I think that’s the first thing people usually look to do, at least us upwardly mobile Miamians. If I’m meeting all my investment quotas, then why not?

Sara Rathner:

That’s definitely the first thing I outsourced in the home. Using your money to free up your time is, to me, such a tremendous use of money. It can be used to add convenience, not just stuff, but also the absence of something that you have to do is incredibly powerful. So yes, definitely, if you increase your salary and want to increase your quality of life in some ways by outsourcing some tasks, then that is a great use of money. It allows you to be around for your family more often too.

I think a lot of it is how you frame it as well. My friend, who’s in construction, does it quite well. He’s willing to take a pay decrease if he can work a third less hours because he always calculates on a per-hour basis. Which if someone tells me their hourly salary now, I couldn’t tell you if that’s a lot or little because I haven’t been hourly in years. So him being salaried, he always does that exercise, and he’s like, “Oh, I’m getting paid $6 more per hour, but I have to work 30% more. Absolutely not worth it.” Like, what does $6 get you? But I just did the exercise for role two, and I did it on a monthly after-tax, what it would come out to. And it’s enough to cover mortgage and daycare—just the raise after tax.

So when it’s framed like that, that tells a pretty compelling story. Like, “Oh, would you switch jobs and have to drive eight more hours if just the increase would pay for your mortgage and your daycare?” which are most people’s biggest expenses. That sounds pretty good. But when you frame it, do you want to spend 8 to 10 hours a week in Miami traffic and possibly get rear-ended and have people cutting you off? There’s almost no amount of money that you’d want to get paid to do that. So I think the framing is just a very, very interesting concept as well.

Elizabeth Ayoola:

So Andrew, tell us now, we’ve had this conversation, after this conversation, what are you thinking? Do you feel like you have more tools to consider if or when another tantalizing offer comes along for a new job?

I think I do. And shout out to the NerdWallet website, there’s a tax estimator calculator on there where you can put your filing status, your age, your household income. From a strictly math standpoint, I think it’s easy. From a value standpoint, it’s definitely more nuanced. So thank you guys for your time and your input as well.

Sara Rathner:

Yeah, no, we’re happy to be part of your decision-making journey because this is something that I think a lot of people go through as they progress in their careers and as their lives get more full and potentially more complicated in hopefully good ways, but sometimes hard ways too. So if you’re out there listening and you’re weighing a potential job change or you’re itching to change jobs, it’s absolutely not just a financial exercise, but it is also a values exercise.

Elizabeth Ayoola:

It absolutely is. And for me, values usually take the cake. But I say that knowing that I have certain privileges, and I’m able to choose. I know not everyone has that option.

So on that note, that’s all we have for this episode. Now remember, we are here for you and your money decisions. So turn to the Nerds and call or text us your question at 901-730-6373. That’s 901-730-NERD. You can also email us at [email protected]. Visit nerdwallet.com/podcast for more information on this episode. And remember, you can follow the show on your favorite podcast app, including Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and iHeartRadio. And what happens there is you’re able to automatically download new episodes.

Sara Rathner:

And here’s our brief disclaimer: We are not financial or investment advisors. This nerdy info is provided for general educational and entertainment purposes and may not apply to your specific circumstances.

Elizabeth Ayoola: